Grief and Loss

The Language of Suicide

photo by Rod Long on Unsplash

photo by Rod Long on Unsplash

One of my specialties is grief and loss, and early in my career I did an intensive training at a remarkable place called “Our House” in Los Angeles. During the training, we were encouraged to share our personal experience with grief and discuss our family traditions when someone died. The leaders emphasized the importance of using the correct language when talking to our clients about death.

We were taught to use the word “die” instead of “passed” and avoid saying someone “committed suicide”, because that phrase implies someone “committed” a crime. Instead they recommended saying someone “suicided”, died by suicide, or ended their life.

Last year I lost a close friend to suicide, she was the second friend who took her life in 2019. When someone dies by suicide, people are often unsure about how to respond.  Sometimes they’ll ask questions about the details of the death which is re-traumatizing for the grieving person. In our death denying culture, we need to find a way to get comfortable talking about suicide and listening to those who have suffered the loss of a loved one.

Didi Hirsch Mental Health Services https://didihirsch.org/services/suicide-prevention/ opened the first suicide prevention center in Los Angeles in 1958. Today their state-of-the-art facility offers a variety of support groups for the general public and specialized training for professionals.

California recently passed a new law requiring mental health providers to complete six hours of continuing education in suicide prevention. Those already licensed will be required to complete this one time training at the time of their first renewal that takes place on or after January 1, 2021, to learn more about the requirements of this law go to https://www.bbs.ca.gov/pdf/suicide_prevention.pdf